I Feel Sick

No, I actually don't have a fever. I feel sick with nervousness. Last Sunday I was asked to teach the lesson in Relief Society this Sunday. The only other lesson I've ever given was in Laurels...and I was nervous for that...and there was only 4 or 5 girls. This is like 6 years later in front of 30 + people that surely know way more than I do. I feel more than under qualified. So under qualified that I should be the last person on the earth teaching them. It's not a difficult lesson though. It comes from the April 2008 General Conference. Given by Elaine S. Dalton, the current First Counselor in the Young Women General Presidency. It is titled, "At All Times, in All Things, and in All Places". It's a really good article if you want to look it up at either lds.org or the May 2008 Ensign.

I think I'm one of those people that get these callings or lessons more for my personal gain than anyone else. (Cause I'm well aware I need to read more church doctrine than I do currently). Basically, the article says "As you stand as a witness, obey the commandments, and press forward with 'a steadfastness in Christ,' you will never be alone." I don't even know how to start out the lesson except to say, "please ignore anything I say that seems irrelevant, off-topic, idiotic, nonsensical, weird, or otherwise preposterous." I hope and also don't hope that since it is a holiday weekend that not very many people will show up. It helps to have a lot of people there because they can contribute to the lesson so I don't have to jabber the whole time but also if there are a lot of people there, that means more people will witness myself being humiliated publicly. Ugh!

I long for the day to already be over! I was going to team teach with another person in the RS Presidency but the one person that would have done the lesson with me is on a trip and really may not even be there. I would definitely be setting myself up for failure if I counted on her being there and they she never shows up! I just pray that everyone in the room tomorrow will have compassion on me enough to never remember the stupid things that come out of my mouth and to really take to heart the good things that I share. I'll let you know how it goes I guess...but, don't expect a long report because it will most likely be embarrassing and I don't want to make it doubly worse by explaining every horrifying detail on the web.